First Student that Cried in Class

I know that I have been missing in action on here for the past little while, but I just have to tell you this story, it is too hard to pass up. First off, I had my first parent/teacher/student conferences this week, and they went a lot better than I was expecting them to. I had a girl cry there too, with her mom, because she was so happy that her efforts were paying off and she had an "A" in the class, this girl also told me that she is now considering to be a teacher after being in my class... what a compliment there. But that is not the story for today, today's story is from a girl that cried and yelled at me during class.....

To not violate privacy issues, let's name this girl Anne. Anne is in my AP Chemistry class at 7:45am on A-days. I know that she has disliked me from day 3 and comes into class with 'attitude.' Last Tuesday I found writing on one of my desks that she had left stating all the things that she hated about me and the class, and how worthless it was, etc. I knew that today I was going to have to call her out on it, but I didn't expect that she was going to come to me first telling me all the things that she hated about the class. In AP we did a lab today, a lab that required that the students were prepared with closed-toed shoes, and pants. What was interesting about that was that the students knew that they were not going to be allowed to participate in the lab without closed-toed shoes and pants. Well, I didn't even warn the students today about that and just told them to get to work on their lab, and Anne comes up to me and tells me that she 'can't' wear closed-toed shoes because she has a blister. I mentioned that she also didn't have pants on (they were capris) and asked what was preventing her from following that requirement. I know, maybe I was being a little sassy, but I didn't understand. She could have worn closed-toed shoes for and hour and a half and then switched her shoes out for the rest of the day, I wasn't preventing her from doing that, and I have had blisters, it isn't the end of the world. She could have come prepared. At that point I asked her what she would like to do instead considering that I couldn't allow her into the lab, reminding her that it was a liability issue, and that I was responsible for her safety, there was no way that I could allow her into the lab. She then proceeded to tell me that I was the teacher and she was coming to ask me what to do, that she didn't know. I then told her that it wasn't my problem that she wasn't prepared, and that she should come up with a solution and I could see if we could make that work. She didn't like that at all. She again told me that I was the teacher I should tell her what to do. That she loved chemistry last year, and that this year she dreads coming to class. I asked her to sit down, and that we could talk in just a moment. I then decided that I might as well get all the issues out there, so that she could hate me all at once, up front, and then she could heal. So, I told Anne that I noticed that she had been writing on my desks and that I didn't appreciate her defiling my room like that, and that I would like her to come in after school to clean desks. I asked her if she thought that was a fair, and she said, yes, I will be in on Monday. Phew. One down, just a few more concerns to go. Then I let Anne know that I did not want her getting a zero on her lab, wanted to help her to get credit, but that I was responsible for her safety, and could not let her into the lab without the proper attire. I asked what she thought would be fair so that she could do the work without being in the lab, and she said she didn't know. Oh, point to mention here: since coming back to talk with Anne after I asked her to sit in her seat, Anne wasn't looking at me while I was talking to her, she was looking off into the distance and crying, it was sad to watch, but I didn't know what else to to but to talk to her, and to let her know that I wanted the best for her, but that I still had to follow the rules/policies. Back to the series of events, well, where to go from here.... she wasn't trying to come up with a solution, she was just upset and couldn't get over that. I decided to address why she despised the class. I asked her what it was that I could do to make it better for her, to help her to learn, to let her to enjoy it. Anne again replied that she didn't know, but that she didn't think that someone that got 130 on all their exams last year should be struggling in this class. I asked Anne what she got on her last exam, and she said that she did well, that she got an A. And I tried to comfort her by telling her that she must be understanding the material to be able to do so well. And then the heart of the problem came out.... I wasn't Bastion (the old chemistry teacher) and she had to spend time that she didn't have doing homework for this class. Anne proceeded to tell me that only after she spent two hours after every class working on homework was she able to understand it. I responded saying that was good, that I had designed for my AP students to spend two hours on homework after every class. And that if she was spending much more time than that on homework that she needed to come in to get help from me before or after school, during lunch, or to email me, and I would be more than willing to help her to understand. Anne then let me know that she is in the heart of band season, and that she didn't have time to do anything. Five minutes, here, and five minutes there she didn't think was going to help her at all. She needed more help than that. I also agreed with her that I was no Bastion, I had a very different teaching style, but that I hoped that she could learn from me as well, and that she could enjoy it, and learn lots. Anne at this point was looking at me, and had thought of a solution to one of her problems. She asked if she could sit in the desks, but help her group by making sure they do the right steps, by doing the calculations etc. I told her that that would be a wonderful plan, she just could not actually be doing the lab for safety reasons.

I think that it was a success in the end. I think that Anne knew that I cared, that I wanted her to succeed, and to learn, but that I also expected her to be responsible and to come up with her own solutions to her problems. I let her know that I was available to help, and I let her know that it was unacceptable to be defiling my desks. I sure hope there aren't a whole lot of these, but I guess there had to be a first, and here it is... all part of being a teacher I guess. Well, here is to another day. I better go to bed so that I can get up in the morning to teach another day.